06/03/2018

Collar x Malice: Not feeling it


Sheesh, is my otome tolerance running low already? Collar x Malice left me cold and utterly bored, which is certainly not a development I expected given the glowing reviews reaped by that game. So what's the problem exactly? Is it me, or is it the game? Why, of course it's the game! It sure cannot be me, because I was very much in the mood for more otome drama at the beginning of my playthrough. So, how did CxM manage to kill my otome buzz? I could draw up a neat list of the things that this game did wrong, but I won't do it because a) I already drew up lists in my recent posts about otome VNs and I'm getting sick of it, and b) I don't care enough about CxM to put that kind of effort into writing about it. See, that's how totally unimpressed I am by that game.

So I'll keep things neat and brief for once and go straight to the heart of the matter. CxM is an excellent game in many ways: it boasts gorgeous art, splendid character design, a stellar soundtrack, an enrapturing atmosphere and a captivating story. It certainly deserves its stellar scores allright; and yet, I didn't like it, because it didn't give me anything. No sweet love stories that made me stupidly warm and mushy inside, no gripping mysteries to uncover through the power of my mighty investigative brain—niet, rien, nada. CxM is basically Amnesia:Memories with collars, guns and terrorists—and without the thrill.

The two games sport a similar premise, i.e. an heroine thrown into a dangerous situation and forced to collaborate with a bunch of rude and wary beaus. Amusingly, both games also sport an uncanny number of branching bad endings in which the heroine gets killed by random people in gruesome ways; however, the similarities end here. Amnesia:Memories puts you in charge of your own destiny and makes you sweat to recover your memories and win the guys' love. Like a private eye on the prowl, you must pick up clues to figure out the nature of the heroine's missing memories and select the appropriate dialogue choices—all this while balancing your beau's feelings and worming your way into their heart. Ironically enough for a game whose main characters are actual cops and detectives, CxM totally fails to exhibit this kind of agency. As leading lady Hoshino, I'm completely passive and have no choice but to let the story unfold with hardly any input on my part. I'm the victim here, but my beau du jour is the one doing all the work and saving my arse. I'm not happy with that, not at all. Why don't I get to investigate, damnit? Am I the bloody main character or not? I'm the Collared One, and a cop to boot; and yet I cannot lift a finger without first obtaining permission from those guys I hardly know. It doesn't make sense story-wise, and it's darn frustrating gameplay-wise.

To add insult to injury, Hoshino's predicament is not even the focal point of the story. The collar is little more than an inverted MacGuffin of sorts: it's the plot device that drives the characters together at the beginning of the game, after which it's promptly forgotten and hardly ever mentioned again. Instead, the story focuses on the hardships of Hoshino's beau du jour, who gets to take centre stage and shine as the route's true star while Hoshino has to play second fiddle. Now listen, game: I have a bloody collar full of bloody poison around my bloody neck here, and I don't give jack sh*t about the troubled past of some guy I just met. That whole story should be about Hoshino first and foremost, and then about her beau du jour. Look at Amnesia:Memories: they nailed it perfectly by centering the story around the heroine's memories, which happen to include the guys. Now that's the way to do it, writers. If you choose to put your leading lady in a sticky situation, make sure she's the centre of interest all the way through and not just a mere side dish.

So, that's another otome VN that bites the dust and fails the Shall We Get Physical Test. That being said, I'm not writing off CxM completely yet. I may come to reassess it on the long run, just like I did with Code:Realize; or I may completely forget about it, just like I did with Steins;Gate. Only time will tell if that game wins a place of choice in my precious collection or joins the ranks of the Games That Failed To Impress Me. For now, CxM will occupy me just a little longer, as I want to write a full report about its resident unsavoury pricks. I did say that there were no sweet love stories to be found in that game, didn't I? Well, I sure won't let these guys off the hook so easily. Thanks for reading, and be my guest anytime!

2 comments:

  1. Thank you for this! I have the exact same problems with this game. I thought I was going crazy because of all the good reviews and I just found this game boring and not entertaining.

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    1. You're welcome! :D Sometimes, one just have to be honest with themselves and admit their feelings towards a game, even if those feelings are at odds with reviews.

      That being said, I really liked the sequel. I wrote a glowing review about it, which you can find here:

      https://thatextralevel.blogspot.com/2020/10/collar-x-malice-unlimited-second-times.html

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